Maybe it is because I know I have to start cleaning out what would have been the nursery. I can't explain why this is so hard and why I'm struggling so much to let go. When hubby and I were married we always dreamed of a large family....12 children. We were shocked when we had fertility problems. After having my first without even trying, I assumed it was DH that had the issues, but he was fine and I was diagnosed with PCOS. Now we add to the mix that he is no longer fine and we have MFI....our RE said that we would need to do IVF because of the MFI and since this isn't an option for us, I feel like that door has been slammed shut. Then we found out that because DH has PKD we aren't able to continue with foster parenting or adopt....two more doors slammed shut. The only thing left is complete faith in God....complete faith that if there is a son or daughter waiting for us, that God will bring us together.
Praise be to God!
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Hi there,,,I just came about your blog by someone elses and I thought I would comment. God has His plan for all of us. It is hard. My dh and I have been TTC'ing for over six years and have never achieved a pregnancy. We are also on an adoption waiting list and no luck in that dept either. We just have been "Living His Will" and accepting His plan for us. We know He has something in mind and we won't know what it is until we relinquish all the control to Him. That is what I'm learning to do (I feel my dh is already there). You are so blessed to have children already and I can totally understand your wanting more.
ReplyDeleteThe last RE I saw was starting to push ART procedures too...I was like "No". I didn't explain why to them..didn't think they'd understand my very Catholic views. I have friends who have done I.VF and they can't understand..but I do and that is what is important. No child is worth going against what I believe. I guess if I have to sacrifice ever having children due to my faith..then so be it. What awaits in heaven is worth it.
Anyway...I hope your dh is doing okay now. And Lord Willing this new RE you are seeing will be able to help you. I don't know if we'll seek dr's help anymore. For now, we are just enjoying being us. God Bless.